What do you do all day?

I had someone ask me recently, "What do you do all day since you stay at home?"

Yes, really...

I am not one of those women who always dreamed of being a stay-at-home mom. Actually, my first dream job was to be a meteorologist. Well, until Tim Ross from Channel 4 told me that if I wanted to have an involved family life it wasn't the job for me. Don't get me wrong, even though it's not what I pictured myself doing, I am so blessed and thankful that I have the opportunity to be home with Madison right now. It is the best thing for her, and that is what is important.

I also have had the challenges of being a working mom. I know how difficult it is after a long day of work to come home & have to cook, clean, take care of a child, and try to tackle the never-ending to-do list.

This IS NOT a post that debates if working moms or stay-at-home moms are better than the other or have a more difficult "job." I think that all moms are superwomen & we all have our unique challenges whether we work a 9-5 job or are home full-time. This IS a post that gives you a glimpse into MY world as a stay-at-home mom.

I do get to sleep in most mornings. Definite perk! Madison is a great sleeper. I am NOT a morning person, so sleeping in until 8:00 works for me! I get Madison up about 8:15 & give her allergy & seizure medicine by 8:30. After she gets her medicine, I like to give her about 30 minutes before eating or drinking anything to make sure it stays down. This is partly habit from where she had horrible acid reflux when she was a baby. Some days, she would throw up her entire bottle or feeding all day long. That 30 minutes gives us a little time to cuddle, watch TV together, or play on the Ipad (which she LOVES).

She eats breakfast at 9:00 most mornings. She takes omeprazole for her acid reflux, and it comes in a capsule that we open up and sprinkle on her yogurt. She eats yogurt every morning for breakfast & not much else. She's not a morning eater (just like me). But she does love to drink her milk every morning while we rock in the recliner. So I sneak in a few more cuddles while she drinks her milk.

The rest of the morning is spent playing, reading books, and yes, sometimes her watching TV in her pack-n-play while I try to get a few things done. I have a cleaning schedule that I try to stick to during the week. It doesn't happen every day, but I do what I can. Thankfully Madison hasn't climbed out of her pack-n-play yet, so she's content in there for a little while as long as Mickey Mouse is on & she has some toys / books to play with.

She usually eats lunch around 11:30 & then takes a good 2-3 hour nap most days.

I'm not going to lie... I LOVE NAP TIME! And no, I do not take a nap too. I am not a nap person - there is too much going on in my brain to be able to turn everything off & sleep. After she falls asleep, I eat lunch & watch TV. My guilty pleasure is Grey's Anatomy reruns that come on Lifetime. (And there are some days where something I'm watching hits a chord & I have a good long cry.)While she naps, I also try to finish up any chores I need to get done.

After she wakes up, we play some more until I cook supper (and no, I don't cook supper every day). Weeks like this week, I haven't cooked at all. I am not one of those moms who cook 3 meals a day & have supper on the table when Jake gets home every night. It just doens't work for me. I'm trying to count calories most days & almost every night we have something going on. So I do what I can, but sometimes we eat cereal & sandwiches. That's just how it works out for us. However, every now and then I do manage to get something decent on the table (and the occasional lunch which probably is a nice surprise for Jake).

When Jake gets home, there are some days where I pass on Madison to him & go work out or just go in another room for a little while. It's difficult some days when you have no adult interaction & feel like you have not gotten one thing done. That is probably the biggest thing I miss about being home is being able to interact with adults. Jake comes home for lunch most days, and there are days where I absolutely talk his head off (and bless his heart, I know he just wants to eat and relax because he's had to talk to people all morning). After I have my little break, I can't wait to get back to Madison though. It's crazy how giving yourself just a five or ten minute "time out" can help. The best thing is when I've gone to work out or run an errand & I walk back in the door... she gets a big smile on her face & runs to give me a hug. Melts my heart every time!

After supper, Madison usually plays or we go to church, ballgames, see family, etc. When we are at home, she gets a snack about 8:00, and then her medicine again at 8:30. She drinks milk again with one of us in the recliner & we try to cuddle with her (usually she just wants back down lol). Then she heads to the bathroom & up on her step stool when I tell her it's time to brush her teeth. She LOVES brushing her teeth! Then off to bed for my sweet princess. She has never let us rock her to sleep. She lays down & puts herself to sleep.

Every week, there is one day where Madison has someone come to the house for developmental therapy for TEIS & we go to speech therapy another day. She is going to have OT & PT evaluations done as well, so we may be adding those therapies during the week if they think she needs it. We also have a lot of doctor's appointments. We go to a pediatrician, cardiologist, neurologist, ENT, pulmonolgist, nephrologist, gastroenterologist, dentist, eye doctor, and geneticist. She is on 4 medicines a day & we have medical equipment in the house for her oxygen monitor. So there are a lot of days I'm on the phone scheduling / rescheduling appointments, ordering supplies, ordering / picking up medicines, etc. Sometimes that feels like a full-time job in itself. I don't know what I would do without my planner to keep everything straight.

We have good days & we have bad days like everyone else. There are days where I feel like I have played with her & done great activities with her. She has done well feeding herself & is trying to say more words & has been a good listener. There are also days where it's a struggle to play with her & it's a struggle to have enough patience to try to work with her on things. I'm not going to sugar-coat things & pretend like I'm this supermom who does "Pinterest-worthy" activities with my child every day. It just doesn't happen. But I do my best!

Being a stay-at-home mom doesn't come as naturally for me as I think it may for some other people, but I try to be the best mom & wife that I can be. Some days that's not very good, but I think everyone has their off days. I don't get a vacation or a pension or even a paycheck. But I do get to watch my daughter grow, learn, and discover new things every day. I don't get to travel like I used to, go get pampered, or shop whenever I want to, but I do get showered with hugs & kisses every single day by a sweet little angel that was sent to me from God. She doesn't really say "I love you" yet, but every time I tell Madison I love her, she wraps her little arms around me, says "awww," and gives me a big hug. That's enough of a paycheck for me!

Disclaimer:  I don't want this post to come across as being negative. Being a SAHM is a positive thing for me & is such a blessing! I think people in general tend to only put their "best" on social media & in front of others (myself included). This is simply meant to give my real experience as a response to the question of what I do all day.

Follow Up from Pulmonology Post

I wrote a post a week or two ago about Madison's most recent Pulmonology appointment. In it, I mentioned my anxiety about not hooking her up to her oxygen monitor & how nervous it made me. The oxygen monitor has been my security blanket since January of last year. We still have it for several more months, but we were going to try to wean ourselves off of it (because medically Madison has improved so much she doesn't necessarily need the monitor every night).

So Thursday night, we decided to try to leave the monitor off. About 10:30 I went and got her to sleep with us so I could watch her breathing. About 3:30am she ended up back in her crib. (Jake wasn't getting much sleep, and he has long work days on Fridays). She did great! We didn't sleep much, but she was just fine.

So all weekend, she has slept in her crib with no monitor & Jake and I have actually slept pretty well! Very big step for us (especially for me). If she gets sick or spends the night with someone we will still use the monitor while we have it, but we overcame a big obstacle this weekend.

Next step is getting her transitioned to a toddler bed...

Big Girl / New Activities

Madison is officially done with her high chair! She loves sitting in her "big girl" booster seat at the table. She didn't have any issues with the transition at all.

She also loves to stand on her step stool in the bathroom. Before bedtime, I'll tell her it's time to brush her teeth & she goes right to it! She's still iffy sometimes on getting down by herself, but she's getting there.

We are working on sitting still for some activities too. Her developmental therapist suggested using a pillow for her to sit on. She is doing pretty good if it is an activity she likes (like books or singing some songs). Here she is doing one of her animal puzzles. (She loves animals!)

I tried a new activity today with some plastic eggs and magnetic alphabet letters. I put the letters inside the plastic eggs & then put them all in a bucket. She had to sit on her pillow, and she picked an egg out of the bucket. Then she opened it, and I told her what the letter was / tried to get her to imitate the sound. She was interested for a few minutes, then just wanted to dump them all out. I like it though, so we will try it again!

 

 

Swallow Study / Pulmonology Appointment

Madison had a follow-up swallow study today. Her previous one showed she was aspirating a little bit when she was drinking really fast & she wasn't chewing well which was why she was getting choked a lot. Her swallow study today went GREAT! They didn't see any issues! Yay!

Then we had an appointment with her pulmonologist. She hasn't had to use her oxygen while sleeping since November, but we have kept her on an oxygen monitor at night while she sleeps. He listened to her lungs today & said she sounded great! We thought that today they would take her oxygen / oxygen monitor away. However, we will have it for another 6 months until we go back to see him.

From the pulmonology standpoint, they feel comfortable with her not having to be monitored at night. Medically she has improved so much from that standpoint (which is a relief to hear)! So right now the issue is Jake & I being comfortable enough to not have her be monitored. Hopefully we will get there before her next appointment in October. I tried to tell myself that I would be ok if they took the monitor away today, but looking back I don't think I'm ready. I'm more worried from a seizure standpoint then her having an apnea episode. All of her previous seizures happened while sleeping, and we only knew about most of them because the oxygen alarm went off where she stopped breathing.

I haven't been monitoring her when she takes a nap during the day since I'm awake & can check on her. However, everytime I walk in her room to check on her I have to stand over the crib to make sure she's breathing. I'm holding my breath until I know for sure she's ok. It's a horrible thing everytime you go check on your child to get flashbacks to the other times you've walked in to find her blue & not breathing.

I don't know if I'll ever be truly ready to have her not monitored while sleeping, but I know that God is bigger then my fears. And I am SO thankful in the progress that she has made over the last 15 months!