Goodbye Oxygen!

This past Friday was a bittersweet day for me. The supply company came & picked up Madison's oxygen & supplies! We have been waiting for them to come get everything for a couple of months now, but it wasn't actually real until the guy who came to pick everything up loaded it into his truck.

I am so happy that she doesn't need it anymore & that it's out of her room... But as much as I was ready to get it out of the house, just having it there made me feel better if something happened where she needed it.

I finally have gotten to the point where I don't have to get up and check on her & physically watch her to make sure she's breathing. However, I do still wake up several times a night & listen to the baby monitor beside me to make sure I can hear her and she's ok. I know that everyone worries about their children, but until you have gone through a traumatic experience with your child, I don't know how much you can relate to what I'm about to say. (Without thinking I sound a little crazy). She has come so incredibly far, but I still have dreams that I go in to find her blue & not breathing. And sometimes I can't get her to wake up or start breathing. When those dreams do happen (and it's less frequently now), I do have to get up & give her a kiss. Going in to find your child not breathing, blue & unresponsive not just once, not twice, but 5 times is something I never want to go through again. Only through the grace of God & trusting in Him was I able to go through it before.

Madison (and all children) are a gift from God. They belong to Him, and He has entrusted Madison to Jake & I. We have endured several hard seasons with her, but we are in a good season right now. I'm so thankful & so glad to say goodbye to the oxygen. God is good all the time!

Halloween

I can't believe it has been almost a month and a half since my last update! My world has been a little (ok, a lot) hectic since the beginning of October. Things are starting to calm down a little bit, but with the Holidays quickly approaching that won't last long!

First, it's been over a year since Madison's last seizure. Her medicine she's on is working right now & that is such a praise. I pray it continues to work, because we know from her last EEG she would likely be having seizures if not on her medicine... And that is not something I ever want to have to see again. Last Halloween was actually the date of her last seizure(s), and we were in the hospital with her during that time. This Halloween was special to us because it was actually her first official Halloween she got to get out & actually go trick-or-treating (even though we just went to families' houses). What would have been her first Halloween she was sick & running fever so we weren't able to get her out, and then last Halloween, as I said, we were in the hospital with her. 

She had a great time. She liked seeing everyone & she loves being scared! I would hide, jump out & scare her, and she would just laugh & laugh! I love hearing that laugh she does when she thinks something is hilarious & it's a deep belly laugh. We call it her "evil laugh." Jake said she had a "Halloween Christmas" from all the goody bags & treats she got. She is so loved & I'm so thankful for how close our families are. She was supposed to be Minnie Mouse. She wouldn't wear her ears, but she was still pretty cute! 😊🎃